Written by: Michael Turner, Christopher Portugal & K. Witcher
[Thes One:]
Yo, I think this time, I've found a shorty for me
We talk a lot, take walks a lot, she doesn't bore me
In fact, she won't ignore me when I speak in music matters
She's intelligent, fly style flatters my own style
Chickens scatter when she floats through the club
Child matters… love, I'm thinking
I met her one night, drinking our success of a show
She walked up and said, "I know you
You're from the P.U.T.S. I think your name is Thes, too."
I said, "Would you like a soda? I'm underage."
Slipped her a number, tipped the waiter
Said, "Give me a page later"
In typical Latin lady flavor, she said "maybe…
Claro que si", that's how it should be
And see, she played me close, next night, dinner
The champagne toast, sunset Pacific Coast
And mostwhile, everything to me was like tight groovy
Always a treat, man, she took me to the movies
Made love to beats, woke up and made me pancakes
And this point, I knew my shit was Land O' Lakes
Fellas, I might be in love, but something's still not right
We didn't fight, but she didn't call me last night
She got mad loot, no jobs, and plus a high rent
A cellular phone to check the Pac Bell message center
Which she does too much, and I'm really not with it
She tells me that she loves me, so I guess I'm committed
[Song sample:] Turndown days… always, always
[Thes One:] Guess I love her…
[KRS-One sample:] It gets better! This girl's kinda clever!
[Double K:]
Yo, I was cooling at the club, about ten on the dot
Drinking Hennesey and Coke, feeling like Tupac
Me and the crew hit the stage in about a half of one
Trying to ditch security 'cause I'm under twenty-one
Just then, I see this fine Latin chick walk past
Face like never before, body like an hourglass
So I was looking at the booty, it was looking right back
You woulda thought she wanted loot, but it wasn't like that
Yo, this girl stepped to me, asked me what was my name
I told her, "Mike," she looked with a grin, said, "That's right!"
Then for a minute, I started to wonder how she knew who I was
Yo, we've been doing mad shows with the underground buzz
Then I asked her her name… yo, I heard that somewhere
Matter of fact, I had, but yo, the K didn't care
All I wanted was the ass, only that and nothing more
Talked a cool 15 minutes, got the number, hit the floor
Saw Thes, gave him the DAT, we rocked the show
Woke up the next day… aww shit, here we go
Seen a number in the pager that I didn't recognize
Matched it up with the little paper received last night
Word up, I'm 'bout to hit the skins like it was my first
Returned the call, got the address, and quenched my thirst
Took a quick shower, was out in five minutes
Big grin on my grill 'cause I knew I'd be up in it
Her crib wasn't far, so I strolled down the road
Kinda high off the blunt, banging on the front door
She opened up, still in her nightclothes
Foreplay was in effect before I closed the front door
You know how it goes, fingers in her shoobie-doobie
Whispered in her ear that I wanted her to do me
And we did it, homeboy, all day and night
But even after that, something still wasn't right
What the fuck Thes' beat-tape doing on your nightstand?
Yo, I figured it out, it was a gameplan
I asked her what's up, she said, "I got a man!"
And I got a what, what, what, what?!?
[Song sample:] Turndown days… always, always
[KRS-One sample:] It gets better! It gets better!
[Assault:]
Y'all didn't see me all day, I stayed at the beta waiting
The car from the maiden I had met when I was chasing
Down the bus, which I missed, but I wasn't too pissed
When I spotted the sis, who lit my eyes like the trees
They put up on Christmas
I said, "Hey! How are you doing today?"
She said, "Aight", the frame was tight, so I continued her way
Shooting the breeze like L.A., conversation was cool
She went to school, had a job, and no meat was the rule
Now, not to send like a gay librarian
I appreciate the fact you're vegetarian
"I eat some flesh once in a while," was her reply
And then she looked at me with that one look in her eye
I said, "What? I'm not your kind of nigga?"
"Not quite, but I'll be very interested to hang out with you tonight
I go both ways," whoa, huh, this girl's a sick puppy
But when she chills at the crib, I'll probably get lucky
But she never showed… all day… missed work…
Bitch never showed up, man… I think she's a bisexual, too…
She had a fat ass…
[Rap sample:] The moral to the story!
[Assault:] It was like red… kinda like reddish-brown…
[Rap sample:] The moral to the story!
[Assault:] Yup, said she, like, uh…
[Double K:] Hold up! Where'd she stay at?!
[Assault:] Uh, like, like, uh, Culver City or something…
[Double K:] Awwww!
[Thes One:] Wait a second… Shit!…
[Assault:] What? Huh?
[Thes One:] Naw, dude!
[Double K:] What's wrong with you?
[Thes One:] Naw, dude! Naw, dude!!
[Assault:] What kind of car she drove?
[Double K:] She had a little Honda or something…
[Assault & Double K:] NOOOOO!!! No! Naw, dude!
[Rap sample:] Fuck police that freak and ca…
*Important Note: These transcriptions are not verified with P.U.T.S., so there may be errors. We are especially unsure of the greyed-out text. We encourage you to offer your suggestions for lyrics corrections on the site's main page.
Trivia:
This track appears on the following releases: