The Ultimate 144
Written by: Michael Turner & Christopher Portugal
[Thes One:]
She would smoke [Mary Mary], the [Black Grass] sin
[Amen Brother], a [Daisy Lady], [Indiscreet] with [The Funky Penguin]
So [Get Me Back on Time], like Stella, I [Catch A Groove]
This [Honky Tonk Women] said, "Dude, [You'll Like it Too]."
So I [Boogie Back] 'cause the [Chella'lla] [Got to Be Real]
[Apache] played, and we [Dance to the Drummer's Beat]
When the [Bongo Rock], she stop, like, "Thes, I'll [Give it to You]."
Your [Pussyfooter], [Different Strokes], [I Know You Got Soul]
But I bounce when the breaks do, I had to [Sing Sing]
[I'm Looking Out My Window], [Funky Music Is the Thing]
See hip hop [Shifting Gears], it's [Hit Or Miss]
Then again, there's no [Soul, Soul, Soul], just [Synthetic Substitution]
My advice: [Get Up and Dance], choose [Heaven {or} Hell]
Meet a belle, [Shack Up], and [Sing a Simple Song] well
Anyways, haters had a [Cold Sweat] in [2001]
[Son of {a} Scorpio] [Scratchin'] [Down on the Avenue]
Like, yo, son, [I Like Funky Music], what a charade
Egging me on like a damn [Easter Parade]
[U.F.O.]-O-L party with the [Big Beat]s, a big liquid
Liquid fill with [Long Red] dawn
We kick it for [Seven Minutes of {Funk}y President]
And [S.W.A.T.] down [Planets] of themes like [Brother Green]
For real, [It's Great to Be Here] and [Ain't We Funkin' Now]?
Drunk and hungover in [Shangri La], ah, [Last Night Changed It All]
[Impeach the President], yell, "[God Made Me Funky]!
Bush, you [Gotta Get Out of Here], take [Action] 'cause [Kool Is Back]!"
[Love's Theme] and [Granny's Funky Rolls Royce] was the Bar-Kays
[Funky Drummer] made [The Champ] [Walk This Way]
Like [Johnny the Fox], who stole [Ashley's Roachclip]
A [Gangster Boogie] move, [Groove to Get Down] quick
See, Ashley was [The {fly} Mexican], but [Keep Your Distance]
A [Runaway {who'd always say} I Wouldn't Change a Thing]
She loved my [Frisco Disco] [Phenomena Theme]
Of a [Handclapping Song] was always [Sister Sanctified]
I lied if I didn't think she'd give the [Willie Chase]
But an [Uphill Peace of Mind] is not worth a busted face
It's tragic like [Knock Him Out Sugar Ray], she'll [Blow Your Head]
For a little [Change] and then call you [Mister Magic]
Instead it's like [Star Wars] in the ghetto, like [Jack & Diane]
A [Bouncy Lady] who wouldn't be letting no [Rock Music] play
While she worked [The Assembly Line]
"[I Walk On Gilded Splinters]," she would say all of the time
While Jack and his boy, [T Plays it Cool], did you puff?
Used to [Think] they smoked [Space Dust], sure enough
They would [Take the Money and Run], she wouldn't [Listen to Me]
Man, [Lovermaniacs], [Yes We Can Can], but Jack was a [One Man Band]
[N.T.] said, "[Let a Woman Be a Woman, {and} a Man Be a Man]
If I drank [Whiskey and Wines], so [Let's Have Some Fun]
[Conga], smoke, [Yellow Sunshine], Jack, [It's Just Begun]"
He said, "[I Believe in Music], we could [Ride Sally Ride]"
[{Getting} Lifted] in the [Rock Creek Park], they gotta hide
A rookie pig caught 'em with the [Cookies], no [Misdemeanor]
"[Bring it Here], [Chicken Yellow], sunshine-fiender
[Put the Music Where Your Mouth Is], [Sport]
[Lonesome Cowboy] paying dues, saying "[I'm Gonna Get You]!"
[Reach{ing} Out {in} Darkness] and he grabbed the punks
Guilty now in the big [House of Rising Funk]
Now, poor Diane got a [Hook & Sling] to fill the commisary
Letter said, "I'm [Kissing My Love] to [Free Your Mind]"
Same cell block, other side, Ashley's [Papa Was Too]
[Hector] hates [Devil{s} With the Bust] [Soul Pride] attitude
Like a ride, just to [Cramp Your Style]
Used to work a diamond mine [Shaft in Africa], wild dude
Said, "[I'm Gonna Love You Just a Little Bit More]
You're mi [Corazon], I'd [Save the World] just to do [The Grunt]"
But Ashley's mom smoked [Dynamite {only} (The Bomb)]
Who's watching [Films] since she had [The Breakdown]
Calm, no [Country Cooking], young Ashley never felt [Joyous]
So she packed her bags, yelled "[Get Out of My Life Woman]!"
Ashley's mom cried, "[You Don't Know How Much I Love You]!
[Honey], [The Easiest Way to Fall] is to [Tramp]"
True indeed, but Ashley replied, tears in her eyes,
"I [Got What I Need], and [You Can't Love Me, If You Don't Respect Me]"
Knew home missed in [Expansions] of the [Blind Alley]
Told Cali to Fox, "She's too [Hard to Handle]
[You and Love Are the Same], oh yeah, and Diane is my mom's name
And it don't matter, [Don't Change Your Love]…
([Party brother:] Drink some more… somebody, pour me some drink!
[Party voices:] Keep it going (repeated)
[Double K:] Where's my gun, nigga?
[Bluefoot:] That's what I be talking 'bout! New Year's!
[Double K:] Alright…
[Party brother:] Got to have the funk… (repeated)
[Party people:] We need the funk…
[Double K:] What you need, man?
[Party people:] Gotta have that funk
We need the funk, gotta have that funk…)
*Important Note: These transcriptions are not verified with P.U.T.S., so there may be errors. We are especially unsure of the greyed-out text. We encourage you to offer your suggestions for lyrics corrections on the site's main page.
Trivia:
- This song is based on the song titles in the Ultimate Breaks & Beats series of compilations, represented on this page in [brackets]. The songs in these compilations are frequently used by DJs and hip hop artists for their samples and drum breaks.
This track appears on the following releases:
- Fun DMC (2008) (CD only) - Gold Dust Media (GDM007)
- A snippet is also included on Fun DMC Press Promotional Mix (2008) (Audio press promo) - Direct from P.U.T.S.
- Live Version: The 10 Year Anniversary Set (Live DVD) - Golden Fire Pig/Piecelock 70
